Awakening


1.

Awaken, O boughs of passion,

saddle the winds with your exhausted words.

Awaken, like roots craving the taste of salt,

like an echo wandering on a rainy night.

Who is there awaiting the bitter drug

of the streets? The dangerous embers of life….

Stare and you will see in me a mirage that sleeps

and awakens with the desert’s sun.

My limbs are exhausted from the cold sun

panting after the dead stone.

O, frigid stone, my limbs

pierce me, they are enflamed

by a bewildering chill like the strong arms

of a future nation.

My limbs are openly gouged by death.

They resist, like the panting palm trees in this land,

this saline land.

They resist and I beseech this panic

to leave….

(The roads are a lighthouse,

the climate of alleys in bygone cities,

mazes for those who can’t see the dreams of the poor on these walls.)

2.

Awaken, for a sweet numbness gathers in my limbs and sharpen me

like a spear plunging in the heart’s folds, exploding arteries

of words. Awaken, my voice is not capable of whispering,

It weeps blood,

the perfume of the seventies,

its comrades haunted by stabs

of doubt. I read only the soil

of the past, my blood is taken from me.

It awakens before birth….abandons me.

I search in a sinful time for blood that haunts me,

for a diaspora that knows the taste of estrangement.

My homeland flees from me.

Who among you has not felt

the ache of blood? Has not questioned

the secret of the flow that secures the heart

on its throne?

I awoke to ask:

who among you?

3.

Converse with me, smug time!

Shackles have baptized my limbs with murderous rust,

with doubt, and they have alienated me

in my homeland.

Awaken, O handful of wind known as home.

Bind up your grief.

The bullet kills

if I do not expel your thirst

….the bullet kills

if I do not retain your blood within me.

….The bullet is coming

if not….

Like the sea, awaken

in waves, or a woman.

In my voice the path of your wound now burns,

My eyes are mirrors of fear, in them

your passion will grow, so awaken.

4.

Muhammad wandered

these roads begging for tears,

pregnant with insanity/death.

You were

a child, a rose….

A book holding the sea between its palms,

a whiteness delirious with flood, a confession

of gulls, steps gathering rocks, a homeland

on edge, its heart leaping with pride.

He ended up at the guillotine.

5.

In my voice you spring like water.

You were the beginning: a night

and you are my lighthouse in all

weather. I passed through childhood.

This is my youth wrapped in timidity,

How can I begin

when panic calls?

6.

O, boughs of lust panting in my palm, awaken

on a homeland, or a horizon….

You will find my eyes enchanted. I am shaking

with fear and love….

Awaken.

Translated by Joseph T. Zeidan

‘Istifaqat’ (Awakenings) 1982

Arabic Female Poets, ed. Nathalie Handal